FBC Boerne Youth
Messages from First Baptist Church Boerne's Youth Ministry. Visit us at https://www.fbcboerne.org/youth/
FBC Boerne Youth
Asking for a Friend Q&A // Week 1
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Join us as we tackle the big questions about God, faith, and life!
Welcome And Panel Ground Rules
SPEAKER_00All right, everybody. So obviously tonight's a little bit different. I feel kind of weird sitting on the stage. I'm normally starting this very much uh in a completely different manner than we are right now. But uh so we've been in our Asking for a Friend series, and so throughout this entire series, we have been uh tackling questions of faith, questions about God, questions about the Bible, uh, and we had a lot of questions. In fact, there were only so many that we could cover just on a regular Wednesday night. And so uh Tony and I actually got the opportunity to do a night kind of like this a while back at a different church where we just said, hey, let's get some of our adult leaders uh and let's get together and let's just try to answer um as many of these questions as we can that have been submitted. A lot of you guys have submitted through a QR code, or maybe you talk to your small group leader about it. But these are questions that you guys sent in, and so we we wanted to be able to tackle those. And so Andrew is going to moderate this for us, and I'll let everybody introduce themselves here in a second. But before we get started, I just want to say a few things because anytime we tackle questions, there's always some limitations. Uh, one, the reason we do this is because we want you guys to know that questions aren't bad. Uh in fact, questions can be a good thing. Questions mean that you're you're seeking the Lord, you're seeking wisdom, you're seeking knowledge. What matters is what you do with them. Do you ask them or do you just kind of let them sit? Also, we're not gonna be able to answer every question. We're not gonna be able to answer every question that we have uh submitted tonight, but we're gonna do our best to answer some of the ones that are the biggest, most foundational. And some have clear biblical answers, and some we're gonna have to say, hey, this is the best that we can do. Uh, it's okay to say I don't completely know sometimes. Uh, and the goal is for you to trust in Jesus, not to just know all the answers or have all the head knowledge. Uh, if you have any questions about anything that we talk about tonight, uh, then please ask your leader follow-up. Don't just let that sit. So, real quick, starting with Andrea moving this way. I mean, you know Andrea, but introduce yourselves.
SPEAKER_04Hi guys, I'm Andrea. Um, and I'll be your moderator for tonight. All right, we'll go next.
SPEAKER_05Hey guys. Hey guys. Um, y'all have probably seen me around here for a couple years now, um, where my ninth graders at. Okay, outstanding. So excited. Great showing, guys. Um my name's Tony Mizetti. Um, and like I said, I've been with the same group of guys, eighth grade last year, ninth grade this year. Um passionate about youth, spent as much time in here as I can. Um, and got three kiddos at home that uh the one baby in the room, I believe, is mine. Well, I know it's mine if that's the one baby. Um yeah, and that's me.
SPEAKER_04Give it up for Tony.
SPEAKER_03Um, I'm Christine.
SPEAKER_00I'm Garrett.
SPEAKER_03Okay, I'm Christine. I am married to Garrett. Um yeah, I'm super excited to be here. I've had, I've been the the current seniors, I've been their leader for like four or five years, and I have eighth grade girls this year, so that's me.
SPEAKER_02I'm Avery. I'm the 10th grade girl leader. I've had this sincer in eighth grade.
SPEAKER_04That's how it's done, some good support.
SPEAKER_02I love you guys. Um, yeah.
SPEAKER_01I got one. I'm good. So it's gotta go back that way. Hey guys, I'm Daniel or Dan Dan or whatever you guys want to call me.
SPEAKER_04Uh there you go.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. It's fun to get to hang out down here again and be with you guys. I miss you all. So it's fun to I'm I'm thankful Garrett asked me to come hang out tonight.
SPEAKER_00So awesome. Well, Andrew is our moderator, so take it away with questions.
SPEAKER_04Let's get started. Okay, y'all submitted some really good questions. Um, so we're gonna start off a little bit practically. And um, one of the questions was how do I start reading my Bible consistently? What helps when Bible reading feels confusing, boring, hard to keep up with? Um, and what book of the Bible should I start in? And if so, why? Anybody?
SPEAKER_00Sorry, we're figuring out how we're gonna share the mic with you.
SPEAKER_03Nobody's gonna answer. I mean, I think back to what Nate talked about at D Now for those of you guys who are at D Now. Um if you Is that better? Okay. Um if you don't already have a consistent time in the word, like having a time, a place, and a plan are really good. So pick your time of the day and keep it consistent. Have a place, right? So maybe not the like in your bed when you wake up in the morning because you're tired. So maybe get out of bed and go get on your couch or something, and then have a plan, right? And so you're like, well, I don't have a plan. What should I read? I have two favorite books, well recommended books for if you don't read scripture regularly. The book of Mark is amazing because it's a gospel, right? It's one of the four gospels, so it it walks you through Jesus' ministry, his death on the cross, his resurrection. Um, and it's also the shortest. It's easy to understand. And I also love the book of 1 John. It's only five chapters, so you can read it in a week. Um, and it's got some really good themes in there. Um, loving God, obeying God, how to discern truth. Um, those are really great themes. Um, so those are my recommendations.
SPEAKER_04Okay, so we got Mark and 1 John. Who else?
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I mean, I think gospels are great because they tell you about who Jesus is. Um if I'm gonna stake my life on this person, then I want to know who I'm staking my life on. Uh and I think to Christine's point, uh, and to kind of just, you know, the the reason you asked this question is probably not because you find reading the Bible super easy. That's okay. Uh most disciplines are hard at first. Most good things take time to feel comfortable. And I'm sure, you know, Daniel, you can speak to this too. Like, I've been a teacher of God's word for years. He's been a teacher of God's word for more years. Uh, and so uh even doing that, like there's days where I don't feel like it, but it's a discipline. Uh, and I know that it's good for me, and I know that it's God's gift to me. Uh, and so finding that plan, finding that place where you can be consistent, even when it's not easier, doesn't feel like just second nature, like that's okay. Like, be consistent, keep showing up, and God will be faithful through that.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, I think the one thing I would add is just as you're doing it, like pick like quality over quantity. Don't try to read like five, don't set out, I gotta read five chapters today. Like, read a chapter, read a few verses, right? Just try to really understand the chunk that you're reading that day and take it in in small bites like that to get in a habit, to get in a discipline, to start to get comfortable with it. Ask good questions of God's word as you're reading it, right? Um, and and try to understand what it was you read, even if it's just one or two verses at a time. So start Leviticus.
SPEAKER_00That's a really fun one to do first. But maybe listen to that one last. Don't do that.
Prayer When Nothing Seems To Change
SPEAKER_04Okay, and kind of on that same vein, um, the next question was um prayer. Like, how do I kind of intentionally pray? Praying is kind of um when I pray, I don't feel like things just immediately change. Um, what do I do if I keep praying and the thing doesn't go away and I keep struggling with the same problem? What do I do? How do I not get frustrated? Am I gonna always struggle with that same problem?
SPEAKER_05So again, uh another shout out back to Nate at D now. He went over prayer as one of the disciplines. And one thing that stuck in in my mind was you know, what we desire, what we what we are trying to get from prayer isn't um or shouldn't always be just the solution to whatever problem we're praying about. Um the goal is closeness with the father. And if you guys remember, Nate used the comparison of you find uh someone that you have intention of dating, um, but you set some really clear boundaries. We're gonna meet for five minutes once a week, um, and eventually we'll get super close and get married. Like, how do you think that relationship's gonna go? It's gonna go poorly. Um, so if we're clear about the goal is to be in closeness, the uh action should then be routine communication with that person. In this case, it's God. So um discipline and rhythm here, much like prayer, is a good habit to get into time and place and regimen, and again, not always going to be your first um desire to want to do. Um, and we have a hard time, especially my generation, y'all's generation, sitting in silence or just being alone with our thoughts. And that's one thing that prayer kind of comes forward with. And if that doesn't feel natural at first, that's totally normal. You guys are inundated with information 24 hours a day. So again, like like Pastor Daniel mentioned, like, be have quality about it. Um have some solitude, some silence, and start small and be intentional with your prayer. Talk to talk to God like He is your father because He is. You don't sit here, or I hope you don't and rehearse. Probably maybe you do if you did something really bad, how you're gonna approach your dad about an issue. Hopefully you come to him or whoever is your mentor that helps you work through things, and you you have someone to just spill your guts to, and that's what who that's who God wants to be for you.
SPEAKER_01All right, and one one thing I'll add on prayer, understanding the purpose of prayer is is actually really important, right? If we approach prayer as like it, God's a genie in a bottle and we we go to pray just to get something, right? Like we're bringing our like prayer is just bringing our wishes to God. Uh, and and if we we didn't pray right, if he doesn't grant those wishes, then we've missed what scripture talks about is the purpose of prayer. The purpose of prayer is to help change our hearts, uh, to get them more in line with the heart of God and his will for our lives. And so when we come to him in prayer, it is conversation. It is uh, God, I want, I want to see things the way you see things. I want to understand what it is you're doing in my life. And God says, bring your questions, bring your wishes, bring your desires to me, but do it open-handed, right? Because I may, you may not see what I see, and you may want to do, God may want to do something different than what you may think is best in that moment. And so prayer is both. It is bringing your desires to God, but it's also doing that, saying, God, if my desires are wrong in this moment, like I give you permission to change them. And in prayer, I want you to kind of help just mold my heart and put me in the right place to hear from you and what you're doing. So, purpose of prayer, I think, makes us like want to do it more, right? Because if we get super disappointed, sometimes I think it's because we have the wrong idea about what prayer is. Um, so that's good.
Hearing God Versus Your Thoughts
SPEAKER_04Wanting the result. So, okay, how do we know if we're hearing from the Holy Spirit God and that He's telling us something, or is it just our own thoughts and what we want or other things that are going on in our own heads?
SPEAKER_00Well, I think there's really two reasons you asked this question. Uh, one is you're in the camp of like, I don't think I've ever heard from God. Like, how do I hear from God? Uh, and we have weird ideas about what it looks like to hear from God. Like, uh, I think who was I talking to today? I was talking to Dan Ball, the legend, uh, because he saw that question on my board and he's like, Well, I hadn't seen a burning bush in 65 years, like Dan Ball does. Uh and it's funny because like a lot of times when we think of hearing from God, like that's what we expect. And usually when I have somebody, and myself included, because I'm I remember having this question and struggling this for a long time, is I ask, Well, are you listening? Well, what does listening look like? Well, God's spoken to you through his word. Every single one of you, God has spoken to you through his word. Uh, you have the Bible uh where God has revealed himself, he's revealed how he designed the world that you live in, how he designed you, how he designed life to be lived, uh, and how he pursued you. And so spending time in his word, spending time in prayer in silence, even just sitting there in prayer, a really uncomfortable prayer is God, I'm listening, what do you want to tell me? That's a terrifying prayer to pray sometimes. But then the second camp that asks that question is, well, how do I know it's from God? How do I know it's not just something that I want? Because I don't know about y'all, but when I want something, I'm really good at convincing myself of whatever it is that I want to believe. Uh, and so I'd say first and foremost, hold that thing up to scripture. Like, hey, uh, is this what God's word, like, is this in line with God's word? Because he's never gonna contradict his word with something he tells you. Uh, secondly, process it in community, right? If you uh feel like, hey, I think God is calling me uh to transfer to IMG Academy and pursue professional football. Well, I'm gonna bring that to my community, and my community is gonna tell me, hey, Garrett, you're you're 5'11. Um, that's not, I don't think that's from the Lord. Like, I'm not the Holy Spirit, but I'm gonna guess like that's probably not what God has in your life. And that's a silly example, but as you bring those things to your small group leader, to your parents, to someone in your life who loves the Lord, they can help you process through that as well. Uh, and there's other strategies as well, um, through the word prayer, all those sorts of things. I I could go on and on, but I'll open it up to anybody who wants to share on that.
SPEAKER_01I think that's good. That's what I would say.
Sin Human Nature And The Cross
SPEAKER_04All right. Um, here's a little bit on a different side. Here we're gonna switch gears a little bit. Um, it says, we're gonna kind of put these two together. Are humans inherently good or bad? And then I'm gonna throw this one out at you too, because I kind of feel like these probably go together. Why did Jesus have to die on the cross to save us? Who wants to tackle it first?
SPEAKER_01Or only I'll start it and I'll let people jump in. Um I'm old. First part of the question: are humans good? Yes, right? Are we basically good? Yeah. Um here's what I would tell you, right? Understanding Genesis 1, 2, and 3 is really important to answering that question, okay? Because it's not just a cut and dry answer. God created a perfect world, right? The Bible says everything God created in Genesis 1, uh, he says it was good. It was very good. So God created a perfect world, and in part of that, he created us, humanity, in his image. So is there goodness in us because God created us in his image? Yes, but you can't stop with that. Yes, you've got to see in Genesis 3 that sin, Adam and Eve chose to do things their way instead of God's way. They wanted to be their own God instead of following God. So therefore, sin infected them and therefore infected the rest of the human race. So while God did create us in his image, what that image is now distorted in ways that we are now sinful. So we are not basically good. Right now, we are basically sinful and in need of a savior, which translates into why did then Jesus have to die? Right? Because the whole, the whole you get to understand your whole Bible, right? God wants to restore what it was that sin destroyed, right? Sin separated us from God. It marred that image of God that is that He placed in each of us when He created us. And so, God, in order to redeem or to restore what uh was broken, right, God had to do something. And the only way that sin can be paid for, right, because the Bible says that sin brings about death, it brings about separation. So in order for sin to be paid, a death had to occur, right? And so Jesus dying on the cross is Jesus becoming the curse for us so that we could then be freed from that curse and experience life, right? And ultimately to look toward the future, that as those who have placed their faith in Jesus, who believe that he did die on the cross for us, which was necessary for you and I to have our sins forgiven, part of that good news of that is also that one day there is coming a day where that sin will be completely, we will be free from it, even in the everyday stuff, so that one day again, we will stand before him perfect, right? Where we will have a perfect relationship with him once again. And the only way that that's possible, right, would be for Jesus to become the curse for us so that he could then exchange that and give us his perfection. So that's the need for the cross, but it ties very much into kind of where we find ourselves as human beings, right? We're not basically good people who do bad things, right? Because of sin, right? The Bible says we are we are bad, we are dead in our sin, but because we're made in the image of God, occasionally we do good things, right? But it's not the other way around where we're good people who occasionally slip up. We're bad people in need of a savior, right? So anybody want to add?
SPEAKER_00Yeah, and I think just very short on that, that's such a great answer because a lot of times we equate like good and bad versus value. Uh, and those are two different things. Like, God places incredible value on human life, yet we're jacked up. Like we we've all chosen to make ourselves God, do things our own way. Uh, and Cliff, if for our seniors, if there's any seniors, yeah, there are a few people who are at passion, uh, he he talked about how all of this kind of weaves together of God does place value on human life, and that's why sin had to be paid for. Uh, we talked about this a few weeks ago. If I bring Max up on stage and just beat up Max and nobody punishes me for that, what does that say about Max's life? That it doesn't matter, right? That I can treat him however and he doesn't matter, same thing as stepping on an ant. There's no value to this ant's life, it's no big deal. But God does value human life, and because God values human life, when we sin against each other and when we sin against him, ultimately all sin is against God, that sin has to be paid for, or God would not be just and he would not be good. And so on the cross, as Daniel said, that's Jesus becoming our sin. So God's not just sweeping it under the rug. All sin is paid for, either by Jesus on the cross or for us for eternity. Uh, not because God is some cruel, unloving God, but because he is loving, loving enough to put on flesh and die for us. Uh so absolutely. I mean, that's the gospel in 30 seconds. Thanks, Daniel.
SPEAKER_01And I made it through the whole thing without saying total depravity. You guys should be proud of me.
SPEAKER_04Okay, so after that, why are there so many religions if Jesus and Christianity is true?
SPEAKER_01I will do this one, but I want somebody else to take a step at it.
SPEAKER_00Go for it.
SPEAKER_03Okay. So I was doing, I was actually reading about this one today just to like clarify my thoughts here. But the fact that there are more than one, like that there are so many religions is not disproving that that Christianity is true, right? Um it's it's actually like a rejection of the one true God, not like an argument against God, if that makes sense. So like if you look at Romans 1, 19 through 21, that shows us that the truth of God is known, right? God has revealed himself to humanity, but a lot of times people don't like a God who demands righteousness and morality, right? So they will create a God who doesn't have those requirements, right? People don't like a God that says that you can't do anything to earn your way to heaven, right? So they will they will invent a God that accepts everyone, right? And so these different religions, like, even though, like, yes, we believe and we know that Christianity is is true, right? Scripture says that that Jesus, I, and the way, the truth, and the life, no one comes to the Father except through me. It that doesn't mean that everyone is just gonna like accept that, if that makes sense. Um so yeah, it's kind of a short answer, but no, I think that's great.
SPEAKER_01And I think the thing I would just add to that is to say I think the fact that there are so many religions is proof that we inherently know that we are not enough in and of ourselves, right? That there has to be something outside of us that we need in order to be right with a God or get to some level of perfection to where everything feels good and right. Whatever the religion says the goal is, right, it is showing man understands fundamentally that we are broken and there is something we need. Right? The thing that you have to get to then when you understand that, like, yeah, there should be lots of people. We are attempting to be right with God. But the problem, all these other religions say they're, they they answer that question with how does someone get right with God? The next thing they say is by doing dot dot dot dot. Christianity, right? The message of the gospel is the only one that says, yeah, you are broken and you can't get to God, you can't earn your way there, so God drew near to you, right? That is the message that is completely different about what we believe as Christians than any other religion in the world is that we could not get to God, so he came to us, right? Which is what the Bible talks about when Jesus took on flesh and uh was because we we couldn't do it, we weren't enough. But uh, that's the beauty of what we believe.
SPEAKER_00Um Yeah, and I think the Bible talks a lot about this as well. I mean, all the time you see in scripture when God's people start to worship after other idols, after other little g gods, um a lot of times what you actually see is that there might Be an actual spiritual force behind that religion. It's an evil spiritual force, it's a demon, uh, but there's something real there that wants to get you to worship it. We talked about this with spiritual warfare a few weeks ago. If there are spiritual forces at play that do not have your best interest at heart uh that want to draw you away from the one true God that actually offers life, they only offer death. And so there's a whole nother spiritual component to it as well. But yeah, that piece about like the fact that we're looking for something to me is an argument that that there's there is a God. Uh, and we know the the Christian God, right? And that's a whole separate question. But um, yeah.
SPEAKER_04Okay, this one I you hear a lot from a lot of different people, it kind of keeps you from going, well, why is there a God? Because he allows people to suffer. So did God create us to suffer? Why do we suffer? And if a love if he is such a loving God, why why does they allow that to happen?
SPEAKER_05So that that first question, did God create us to suffer? So I mean that goes back to the creation story. So ask yourself if you if you go through the creation story and you go through the first five days, it is it is nothing more than God creating step by step a beautiful place for what occurs on that sixth day. So ask yourself, like, what is that a not loving God that would do such a thing? Culminating it ultimately in His His creation in us. So the the garden was a place to be enjoyed and in closeness with Him. So when you ask the question, what did God create us to suffer? You know, by definition, He created us for uh to bear His image and to be in closeness with Him in this place of perfection. Um and in that place, so the next question, why do we suffer? Right, that was a that was an environment that we chose to ruin through the you know the rejection of God's will and in His in His in worshiping only Him and choosing to worship ourselves in the transgression we made in the garden by partaking of the fruit. So why do we suffer? Foundationally, it's it's the result of that one choice that then has brought sin into the world that we then inherit as sons and daughters of Adam and Eve. So that you know that's the answer to why do we suffer? And it was certainly not created, the world was not created for us to sit here and suffer in it. But how how amazing is it that that same God provides a way to restore that right relationship through the gospel that was so eloquently explained by Daniel and others?
SPEAKER_01I wasn't sure. Um one thing I want to add, I don't know if we'll get to another was another question that kind of piggybacks this one, but there's I didn't come up with this, but it's it's one of the most helpful things I've heard. Uh Tim Keller was a pastor in New York City, and he talks about this very thing, and he says, um, he talks about evil, he talks about suffering, and he says, I want to be clear, God never calls evil good. There are really genuinely bad things that happen to us and in our world, right? We do suffer because of what Tony said, because our world is broken by sin. And so there is suffering in this world. And and it's so helpful to understand, God never says that that is a good thing, right? He calls that evil, he calls that wicked, he is broken over that, so much so that he allowed his son to die for us. But here's the the beautiful thing in this, right? There is suffering that is not caused by God, that is called caused by sin, but because of what Christ has done, because he paid for our sin, because he was buried and died, he died, was buried, and he rose again. And and we have this hope that one day God is going to completely reverse that curse of sin. Everything the Bible says in Revelation chapter 21 is going to be made new, right? Like sin will eventually be completely eradicated, right? There, God is the one who can say, yes, evil is evil, and I'm not calling evil good, but I, through what Jesus did, can bring good out of evil and or out of suffering. And I think that is what many, many of us who have walked through hard things, and maybe even you guys could give testimony that, yeah, what happened to me was not good. The things I've had to walk through are not good. But when I go to Jesus with that, when I will trust him with it, he can somehow bring good from it. That and it's something only he can do. Uh, and so a right perspective on suffering is it's not an easy thing, but it really only makes sense when we do what Tony said, when we take it to uh this picture of the gospel, which actually gives purpose to some of the things that we have to walk through in our life.
SPEAKER_03This will be super, super fast, but kind of like what you were saying, like even though God is not the orchestrator of evil, he is sovereign over evil, and we know that God is good. So, like you see in scripture that that God, like Daniel was saying, like uses suffering, right, for for our good, for our growth, for refining our faith. Right. Often we we we try to like link, like, oh, something bad is happening to me because I must have messed up, right? Or oh, I'm going through a really, really easy time in my life because I've been really good, right? A lot of sometimes we just suffer for for the glory of God, right? Like if you look in John 9, they come uh Jesus and his disciples come across a blind man, and the disciples are like, Rabbi, who is it that sinned that would make this man blind? Um, was it his mom? Was it his dad? Was it him? And Jesus, Jesus responds with with it wasn't any of them. It wasn't because no, it's somebody sinned that made him suffer. Jesus' response was, this happened so that the works of God might be displayed through him. Um, and so God had a has a higher purpose for our suffering. Um, so just as an encouragement, if you are walking through something tough, like don't waste what God allows, right? Glorify God, right? God will be glorified and everything will be used for your good and for his glory. Um, and so trust that when you are going through a hard time.
Sharing Faith Without Pushing People
SPEAKER_04Okay, I have a couple of really practical things that I know students struggle with at home and at school, just not sure how to answer these questions or how to move on from certain things. One of the ones was um, how do I w witness to someone who's not seeming interested in Christianity? Um, maybe even their parents are not interested in Christianity. How do they witness to them in a practical way that doesn't offend them or push them off? What would be a good practical suggestion for that and for friends and other people?
SPEAKER_02No, I did not.
SPEAKER_04I'm sure there's I'm sure you could have some thoughts on that.
SPEAKER_02Um that's hard because I had like tried to do that when I was at school. Like I there was this girl, she was agnostic, she didn't want anything to do with it, and I I tried so hard to invite her to things and to maybe talk to her about Jesus, and she just was so uninterested. So then I just thought, well, I'm just gonna love her really, really well and always show up for her, and when she says things that I don't agree with, I'm just gonna be like, okay, and like maybe try to talk to her, but I think that through the time that I spent with her, just showing her a lot of grace and a lot of love, she was more open to the things that I did want to talk to her about, and it was just because I wasn't ac accepting of what she believes, but I was really respectful not to push her into something that she really didn't want to talk about, and I just left it open and told her that it was always open, but yeah.
A Real Testimony Of Coming To Jesus
SPEAKER_00I think that's a fantastic answer. I was gonna say the same thing, like it's your life that will preach more than any of your words. Uh and frankly, a lot of people that you're gonna run gonna run into here in Bernie have heard a lot of Christian words. Uh, there's a lot of churches in this town, praise God. There's a lot of Christian events that go on. Uh, there's a lot of people who are not followers of Jesus, but are familiar with him, uh, and and they say, hey, he's not for me. But a lot of the times that's because they haven't seen uh they haven't seen what it's really about. They might be familiar with church, they might be familiar with people that call themselves a Christian, but if they see you actually living sold out for Jesus, not doing the things that the rest of your friends do, not um talking the way they talk, not acting the way they act, and not only not doing bad things, but but doing good things, caring for people, serving people. We were talking about this with my boys uh the last two mornings of actually like loving the people on the outer edges. A lot of times, in my experience, I've seen that peak interest more than anything you can tell them. Uh and again, it's not just about a lot of times when we think about being different, we think about what not to do. Think about the proactive. How can I love that person? How can I show them grace? How can I, you know, not be sneaky, but be um what's the word I'm looking for? Be winsome. I don't, that's a weird word. You eat the point, like be strategic with let me put myself in places with this person where I can live as a Christian and they actually see that. And it's not performing, but it's any discipleship. If I'm wanting to help somebody grow closer to the Lord, we're gonna spend time together. So spend time with that person in the right spheres. That doesn't mean go to the party with them and do all the things they do, but position yourself to where they can see you actually follow Jesus because following Jesus is beautiful. Like the life of a Christian is a good life, even if it's not always easy. We have something that they don't have, that the world doesn't have joy, hope, peace. Uh, and and the world's looking for that desperately. And so they might not be interested in it up front, but whether they know it or not, they're looking for what you have. Uh there's a and and they don't know it more than likely, but there's a longing in their heart, right? We were made to know God, and there's this this missing piece there, this God-shaped hole. Uh, and you have the answer. And sometimes it just takes a lot longer.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_05I'm a I'm a firm believer that your best your best asset when you're when you're sharing the gospel with others is your own testimony. And so here's mine. I uh I became I was the friend that Avery is describing. Um, and I was here in Bernie, surrounded by by guys and gals like you. And there was one uh one young man named Jacob who was my Avery. He and would constantly invite me over to his house, specifically on Saturday nights for a sleepover, so that they could drag me to church the next morning. Um, I I and I wanted nothing to do with it. He was the guy that made things awkward because he wouldn't look at the things we were looking at on our phones, go to the things we wanted to go to. By the end of high school, I kind of wanted nothing to do with him because he made things so awkward and kept bringing this Jesus guy up. Flash forward to my sophomore year of college, and this goes into suffering. Your testimony doesn't end once you come to Jesus. Our best representation of the gospel is how we behave and what our what our conduct is in the midst of suffering. So by that point, I had um I had a girlfriend and she now my wife, and I would drop her off at church and go home. I would drop her off at Wednesday night ministry and go home. And um things got really dark for me because my grades couldn't perform, right? I'm sure you all of you have been there, and when you put your faith only in your performance, it will fail you every time. And uh I got to a place where I'm almost certain I would have been diagnosed with depression, and I decided, okay, this is a long shot, but I'll go. I just don't want to study tonight. I'm gonna go with my girlfriend to this Wednesday night worship. Um, and it was there that I saw guys that I knew had just failed that exam way worse than I did. Their hands were raised, they had smiles on their faces, and they were they were worshiping their savior. And it was their uh joy in the midst of suffering that made me realize what Garrett was just talking about, the thing I had been longing for, which was purpose outside of myself and ultimately purpose in Christ. And by the end of that semester, um, I raised my hand at an altar call and I came to the Lord and been there ever since. So it doesn't end here. I want to get married to this girl now. So I have no church home. I wasn't a Christian here in Bernie. Who do I reach out to? I reach out to Jacob, haven't talked to him in eight years at that point. And I say, Hey, you're the a Christian in Bernie. I know. Do you know any pastors that will marry me and my wife? Um, and he says, Yeah, I know one. His name's Danny Phillips. And uh we meet with Danny, I give him my testimony, and he's who um he's who ultimately married my wife and I in the middle of COVID. But that that kid, Jacob, who's now a man, um, you know, he didn't hear for me for eight years. He thought I was a lost cause. And I got to have the joy of telling him that all of the work that he had put in and those uncomfortable conversations had fruit. You're not always going to get that redemption and that closure, but every now and then the Lord will show you that what you're doing is worthwhile.
Anxiety Self Harm And Getting Help
SPEAKER_04All right, those are great. Okay, I wanted to end on a lighter note, but I feel like because we had a couple of these um asked, I'm just gonna throw this one out here for the last question before we leave. Um, I feel like we have a lot of other questions. So if you still have questions you want answered later, find a place to talk to somebody, or um, we'll talk about that later. But this one has come up a few times. It says, How do I know that um my anxiety is normal anxiety? How do I know if it is clinical anxiety and I need more help? And how do I fight maybe self-harm, suicidal thoughts, all of those kind of things? Is this something I'm just fighting with the word of God? If so, maybe what's my first step? And then second, if not, what should I do?
SPEAKER_00Yeah, well, I'll start uh, you know, with with the time we have, I'm not gonna be able to fully address self-harm, suicidal thoughts. The most clear thing you can hear me say, because I know in a room this size, there are likely more than one of you who have struggled with this, are struggling with this. Bring it to the light. Talk to someone, get help. Uh you're not supposed to, and you can't do it on your own. Uh, and there's no shame in talking. Uh so please find a leader, find your parent, talk to them, come find me. Uh, don't let that go another day with that being a secret struggle. There is life in I I don't even like confessing sometimes has negative like terms to it, but but confess it in a in a life-giving way of letting someone know so that they can help you. Uh, on the anxiety piece, Daniel, we just shot a podcast on this. So, not to throw you out there, but we had a breakout on this at D now as well on anxiety, what's normal, what needs help, all that sort of stuff.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. Um, so I will say there's there's there is a difference, right, between just having moments where you feel anxious and feeling like you're just kind of stuck in that place. Like it's just become like everything is is revolves around that. Um I tell you, tell you one thing, feeling anxious, having those moments, um, even kind of feeling like I'm in this place where I'm overly anxious about everything, that is not like something like Garrett said, to be ashamed of and to just run and hide with that. It's actually, I'm realizing it is it is actually the grace of God, it's the love of God that's allowing you to feel that because he's showing you, hey, something is off, right? And so that is why we need to go talk to someone. And I would tell you, even if it's just, man, I'm having these moments where I feel anxious, or I just seem to be stuck in it. Either way, I think the answer is the same. It's don't try to process that in isolation. Do that with people that you can trust. I would say go to your small group leaders, come to Andrea, come to Garrett, talk to talk to one of the pastors here at the church, talk to talk to someone who can just help you process it because it could just be, right, you've placed your hope in the wrong thing and you're disappointed, and so now you're worried things aren't turning out the way you want, and you just need somebody to help you get a better perspective, right? Or it could be, right, like there's just some things that you you have you have faced in your life that are just bigger than you can handle on your own. Um, and like you at 13 or 14 or 15, right, you are not emotionally or mentally able to handle some of the things that maybe you've had to experience. And you really do need to have somebody that can walk with you long term, that knows how to help you process those things. Either way, the solution is do it in community, talk to someone about it, bring it into the light. Don't feel like anxiety is a sin, because anxiety is not a sin. I want you to hear me say that it is not sinful to be anxious, right? Anxiety is just a symptom that says, hey, something is not quite right. So I want to talk with someone to kind of help identify that, figure out what it is I need to work on and take steps uh to get through that. So, in a nutshell, that's my soapbox on anxiety.
Final Encouragement And Prayer
SPEAKER_04All right, well, that was awesome. We appreciate all of y'all being here for our panel. I wish we had more time for more questions. But we are hoping that this will just start the process of just talking through more things. Just remember you're not gonna have all the answers to all the things. So when your friends come to you, it's okay to say I don't know. Um, and just remember that the scripture has more answers than you'll ever be able to probably process. But know that we're all here to talk to you and we would love to have more conversations and hopefully get some more of your questions in the future. Right.
SPEAKER_00That's right.
SPEAKER_04Gary, you want to close us out?
SPEAKER_00Yes. Uh, and I mean, I don't think we got to questions that we have on the sheet. So if you found this helpful and would be interested in us running this back, I haven't talked with any of the people up here about this, but uh let your small group leader know, and maybe we can run, do another night like this, answer some more questions. Uh if not, that's totally fine. So I'm gonna pray for us and then we're gonna go to small groups, all right?